Alternatives to Fairyland

 

Alternatives to Fairyland

'Why don't you move to Russia?' That used to be the call that you would hear in England, back in the 1960s and '70s, every time that anyone criticised the country, the government, or the way of life. The implication, of course, was that if you didn't like the way things were done, why then, you'd better move. Get out of here, and don't come back, was the message. If you hated living here, was the assumption, then you'd be better off somewhere else, preferably somewhere far away. Of course this is ludicrous. Just because Britain might be the greatest country in the world, it doesn't mean that there aren't things about it that can't be improved.

Personally, I love England. It always reminds me of a Never-Never place, a real fairy-tale country, that is completely divorced from reality. The most recent thing is the failing economy. All the newspapers are full of stories like 'Are we heading for a recession?' Are they for real? I studied Economics as a teenager and I didn't learn much, but the one thing I remember is the concept of Economic Cycles. The economy goes up, it goes down. It's been that way since records began, way back in the eighteenth century. Is anyone seriously saying that 'things have changed', 'uh, it's not like that anymore'? Of course we're going to have a recession, maybe not today, maybe not next month, but the economy goes up and down, every student knows that. So if it's been going up for a number of years, then yes, we're due for a downturn. Actually, overdue. Is there any question about that? Well, yes. In England, so-called professional commentators seem to be living with the illusion that the boom can go on for ever. How much of a fairy tale is that?

When I was a kid, I used to listen to a show on BBC radio that was aimed at children. It was called 'Toytown'. I don't remember much about it, but I remember Larry the Lamb, a model citizen, always taking his complaints to the Mayor. 'Good morning, Mr Mayor', says the lamb, (in a sheepy kind of voice). 'Good morning, Larry', says the Mayor, 'and what can I do for you today?' The answer to that, of course, was that the Mayor was supposed to solve all of Larry's problems. Well, yes, it worked for Larry, and who knows, the Mayors of England may still be able to tackle all of the sheep issues around. But somehow the country hasn't grown out of the idea that it's all solvable. Whatever your dilemma, take it to City Hall and they'll sort it out. Well, boys and girls, that's actually quite a childish concept and not fitting for the real world. It's an illusion, just like the idea of no more recessions. Okay, we haven't had a total economic decline for almost a generation. That doesn't mean it won't ever happen again, or that we're not due one, right now.

Another fairy story is about property. People in Britain have bought into the idea of being 'home owners', (in reality, mortgage owners ' the banks and building societies own the houses). There's a kind of 'life plan' that sees young couple struggling for years with a mortgage they can't afford, trying to buy a small house which they hope will grow in value. If it does, they'll be able to sell it and buy something bigger, maybe a bigger house with a garden, where their newly-arrived children can play. They'll sell that place and move to something bigger. The culmination of all this 'trading up', is that they plan to arrive at retirement time with the kids having left home and them being the proud possessors of a large, detached house. They can then 'trade down', which means selling up and moving to something smaller, maybe a bungalow, and pocketing the cash difference, money that will see them safely through retirement.

It doesn't work. Firstly, interest rates have gone up, which means mortgage repayments are moving into the realms of 'unaffordable'. Some people are having to give up the game, sell up and rent. Meanwhile, house prices have risen so far that new people can't even get onto this rising ladder. With no new 'first time buyers', all sales slow down. If you can't sell the one you're in, you can't buy another to move into. The cycle slows, then stops. Worse, people at the end of the line are finding that prices have gone up so much that there are no cheap bungalows for them to acquire when they sell their 'big house'; the two properties are practically the same price. They make no money, no spare cash. Even worse, they can find no small houses in their area. They want to 'downsize', they'll have to start again in a new area. Few old people want to be uprooted so drastically. So they stay put, struggling to meet the bills of their big, old house, with no spare cash to pay for the treats and travel they had planned for their retirement.

Astonishingly, despite all the evidence that the plan doesn't work, very few people have the wit or the nerve to get off the train. They stick with the fight to pay the mortgage, hoping now that their children will benefit, inheriting property that will sell and make them rich. It doesn't, either thing. Still, what is evidence when you've got a dream? Just like the dream of the white picket fence and roses round the door, which people cling on to in America, English couples spend their lives chasing money to pay the banks for the houses they live in, all the while hoping against hope for a fairy tale ending. Who could possibly think of moving, when such entertainment is on offer? Not even Russia can provide such daily amusements!